Category Archives: Dating

Just Talking Versus Getting To Know Someone Is There a Difference?

HEY HEY HEY!!! Here we go again!! Something for you guys to think about when meeting new people. When I meet new people and there really feeling me blah blah blah and I am feeling the same way they immediately start off in the “Getting to know them” category. You can say you are “talking to them” but you have to understand “talking” versus “getting to know” is understood DIFFERENTLY by a lot of people.

Some people assume that if you are “talking” to someone that you are trying to get with them, sometimes that may be the case but others times it’s not. Others think as “talking” as “getting to know” someone and there at the beginning stages of a friendship.

For Example: If one of my friends asked me “Hey Kevin how are you and Kelly doing?” “We are good, we are just talking.” How would you take this statement?
A) Talking

B) Getting to know
Next example, “Hey Kevin how are you and Kelly doing?” “We are good, just getting to know her”
A) Talking

B) Getting to know

Just think about the word and think about how it’s being used, it could be any answer if you want it to be but you have to understand PEOPLE understand the phrases differently. Talking could mean trying to get with, getting to know or whatever you want it to be, so can getting to know. THINK ABOUT IT!!! Is there really a difference to talking and getting to know someone?

Jamel V.
The age old battle of relationships continues, this time taking a perspective on how people actually get to know each other.

What is the difference between talking and getting to know somebody? Is it one in the same or two completely different animals that spawn different results?

I recently dated a girl that had an issue with the way I was talking to her. I wasn’t disrespectful or condescending to her in any way, but she was mad because I wasn’t talking to her in a way to become her boyfriend.

I immediately grabbed two fish and five loaves and spent a long time figuring out what she meant when she said that. Ironically, this was the first girl that I had really been opening up to, and we ran the gauntlet on everything, which is something I don’t normally do. I guess as much as I was TALKING to her, I was GETTING TO KNOW HER more than anything else. Go figure.

I’ve come to determine that talking and getting to know somebody are one in the same. There really isn’t a difference, except having a mutual understanding of the possibility of something serious happening. This is truly where people begin to lack.

Without talking, you can’t get to know somebody. I guess talking is more extreme than getting to know somebody because it involves more actions of a physical nature, and that doesn’t include sex, necessarily.

I guess the other main difference has to do with the spark. You have to have attraction, desire, and all that other stuff to develop the talking and getting to know someone.

Christy
They are two completely different things so don’t get it twisted! First and foremost, getting to know someone is what it is. It’s the beginning stage… That’s when you ask the other person all these little questions like, “What’s your favorite color?” or “Where you from?” the small questions to try and get to know them. This is when you are figuring out if you actually want to ‘talk’ to this person or not. It’s also how they approach you, well in my point of view, I look to see how often he texts me, if he calls me and how interested he seems to be when he does hit me up. It looks so analyzed but that’s how I break it down and decide if I actually want to talk to the person. So if they sound too thirsty, then I don’t choose to move on any further but if you somewhat thirsty but somewhat quenched then you’re in good standings with me. This is when I usually decide to talk to the dude. Now explaining this getting to know someone and talking is somewhat blurred but you usually can tell when you are ‘talking’ to someone. Because talking is more when you already know the small details about them, you talk via text/phone on a daily basis and ya’ll are already hanging out. But don’t get it twisted, if your ‘hanging out’ is messing around theennn ya’ll are NOT talking, ya’ll are just friends with benefits, or just plain fuck buddies but that’s a whole other topic! So all in all, getting to know someone is when you are feeling them out to see if they are interesting enough to ‘talk’ to. It usually leads into talking but people just never notice. So both ARE different things!

Searching For Partners In All The Wrong Places

Sometimes when we are looking for a significant other we look at the most unnecessary places or just not the right places at all. Why? That’s we do as humans we think it’s okay to look for people anywhere and see no wrong in it. Have you ever thought that people go to certain places just because they think they won’t be bothered by certain people just because they want to enjoy themselves? People don’t expect to be bothered at certain venues because of how awkward it is such as Funerals, Clubs, the gas station etc.

Location: Club
This is the NORM for some people to bag and tag partners in the party scene. Usually the club is a “iffy” place because most clubs aren’t meant for you to look for a partner at. People go to clubs to have fun, enjoy themselves, get there swerve on, relieve some stress and just do them with their friends. If your intentions every time is to walk into a club and be like “Ima bag that person right there and that one too” then you definitely not enjoying yourself. Sometimes it’s not even the social setting for something like that at all. Lounges are SOMETIMES places to socialize with people and get to know them at, but if people are trying to dance and tell you to step off then that really isn’t a good environment to be searching for a partner. It’s okay to make friends with them and go about your own thing but if you’re trying to be more than just a friend within that 4-5 hour timeframe and hang around them the whole time asking them a million questions about them while they are trying to have a good time that’s not a good look at all.

Location: FuneralYou’re at a family, friends, someone you know funeral and your paying your last respect for a person you know. This is usually a time to reflect on the times you spent with them and the happy moments in life. There are always those people who try to get you at your weakest time and feel that it will benefit them. I feel as though this is just completely disrespectful, them trying to mourn a loss and you coming in to try and bag them. This is the wrong setting for something like this its cool if you talk to them and comfort them through the situation, but if your intentions are just to get with them cause there at their weakest point this is filthy and disgusting and you should rethink who you are as a person.

Location: Gas Station
I think this has to be the worst setting especially if you’re in a rush to go somewhere (that’s usually ALL the time) and someone stops you and tries to have a long conversation with you. Just take my number and we can text each other at another point in time and point but your bout to make me late so move out the way. If you got the time go right ahead but me personally the only time I need gas is when I need to be somewhere important and fast and if someone came up to me asking 21 questions about my life I would just give her my number and I’ll forward her my resume later.

Searching for a partner where ever you go should not be a priority on your list you should just get to know people and figure out what you do from there. There is always a time and place for everything but these particular situations you have to know exactly WHEN and WHERE the right time to do these.