I touch on this topic a lot because I am always surrounded by people who think of others before thinking of themselves. They would rather put people’s happiness before their own and I also find myself in that same boat. It’s not just people’s happiness they always put before their own but other stuff before their own endeavors. The long hours at work just to come home and forget about their side project. I feel that you have to do better for you, so you don’t feel drained from the weight of the world.
Continue readingCategory Archives: Selfish
Take One For The Team
So you are out with your crew and you are all having a great time. Then another group pops up of the opposite gender and you both have about the same number of people in the crew. They looking good, you guys are looking good, so the team makes a move. Everyone picks up on somebody but then you realize the one you got isn’t as pleasing to look at as the other ones. So what do you do? Take one for the team or quickly step away? You know if you step away the team might lose but if you take one for the team you might lose. What do you do?
We have all been in those situations where we literally had to “take one for the team” and it wasn’t the best thing ever. A situation I was put into is when I was with my boys in Miami, having a wonderful time. We was on the beach, had the music bumping, everyone trying to be around us. Three girls walked up on us and my boys pounced like lions trying to find they mate. I was left with the friend they just wanted to bring along. You know how I know she was the friend they really didn’t care about? It’s because she was wearing a 2 piece with a huge c-section scar and had the worst edges I have ever seen in my life. I had to make a life changing decision on if I would “take one for the team” or walk away from this situation. I raised my hands up, said “nope” and walked away. I would not be a victim of this “take one for the team” situation in Miami of all places. I am not the best looking dude in the world but I am acceptable to look at. Sadly she was not and I would not force myself to just sit there and entertain her. I used my “pass” for the year and I was fine with that.
What is the “pass” you ask . . . well it’s something me and a couple of my friends do. We are allowed only 1 pass for the year. Meaning if there are a group of girls and we don’t want to kick it to the one friend we just say “pass” and walk away. Not the best system but it works for us. If you have an understanding with your friends then you guys would have created a system that fits you when you need to be saved or you just want to walk away from a situation. Don’t act like you don’t. I’ve saved a couple of my female friends from dudes who were harassing them. They gave me that one look and I’d smooth walk over, grab her hand and walk off with her while the dude was looking.
Remember to set some guidelines when it comes to “taking one for the team” because if this isn’t set then we all losing. Sometimes people don’t like being put in these situations but all you can do is live and learn.
The Selfish Thought . . .
DISCLAIMER: My random thoughts are not about anyone so please don’t come at me asking if this is about you. If you have a guilty concise maybe you should go do something about it 🙂 that is all.
So occasionally I text a couple of my friends early morning and ask them random questions. One question that was brought up is “Are women more selfish then men when it comes to keeping people in their lives after something has changed in their relationship?” Out of the 10 people I have asked, they said that they feel that women are. Let me tell you the facts before you feel some type of way.
Say you are chilling with one of your friends, you guys have been cool forever and then out of nowhere they do something or say something that hurts/disturbs your friendship with them. Some people immediately cut you off just because they feel as though they can’t value you as a friend anymore. Its certain things that you do to people that will piss them off and they will just entirely fallback from you. Guys are more likely to literally cut you off and won’t think twice about it. Girls on the other hand will still want you around because they feel as though nothing has changed but they are 100% wrong. It’s just like leading someone on to the point of no return and then just abruptly saying,” We can’t do this anymore, let’s just be friends.”
After 6+ months of putting work in for something and hearing that (let’s just be friends), guys really will THINK “WTF?! REALLY THOUGH?!” but say “okay I understand.” We immediately back off and keep it moving, we do get hurt and the only way to get over it is to get away from you. Sometimes though, girls move in closer thinking that things will stay the same and we can still do all the things we did before. NOOO. Once you put us on the sidelines best believe all the things we did to try and impress you will stop and we will treat you like any regular person. You have to understand we hate feeling like you just want us there to make you happy because we actually aren’t now that things are different.
“You never know how great something is until it isn’t around anymore, don’t take anything for granted”