Category Archives: Trust

Would you allow your significant other go through your phone unrestricted??


This topic I let sit around for awhile because it is one of those questions you have to ask yourself when you get into a serious relationship with someone. Would you allow your significant other to go through your phone unrestricted? Well would you? I’ve received 80% of my responses through, text messages, twitter and facebook and the verdict is YES. Why yes you ask it’s because if you built up that trust then what do you have to hide since you guys are serious about each other. Of course everyone needs their privacy but at one point in the relationship you give up your privacy because of the trust that you have built up.
For those who said NO their reason was that it’s your personal business of what is going on, on their phone not their significant others. If they trust you then they should know that you’re not doing anything behind their back. 
The next thing that comes in to play is trust . . . do you trust the person enough that you don’t have to go through their phone? Trust is the building block of relationships, if trust is lost then more arguments tend to erupt over nothing, stress may buildup, self esteem is lost, or the relationship just ends. 
Next time you are with your significant other think to yourself “Would I let you go through my phone?” Is there a trust issue or is it just because it’s your privacy you are trying to keep?

Diary of a Woman

Good day all, it’s been awhile since I wrote something . . . just kind of been observing the world, reconnecting with friends and staying on that success grind. One of those things that always catches my eye is when a female is able to remember EVERY DAMN detail about anything and everything. Whether it is bad or good, if it has some importance, they will remember it. Think about this statement “Women keep diaries Girls keep sticky notes.” Seriously THINK about that statement and apply it to certain situations in your life and tell me if this isn’t true. This is all based on growth, maturity level and how you grew up, so don’t think otherwise. FYI Keywords here are WOMEN and GIRLS

“Women keep diaries” refers to how they seem to remember everything and how they keep track of it for future reference. I could go into more details into what that means but that is just boring. In this case, it would be better to have an example and keep it moving. A good example would be if a guy cheats on his girl, she writes in her mental diary “This bum ass nigga(excuse my French) just cheated on me with this ugly Nicki Minaj look alike who ain’t even got an ass named Mercedes on Tuesday February 15th 2011 at 9:05PM” Notice that the date and time was taken in this mental diary . . . . this is for future reference if she decides to take dude back she can use it against him later. If she decides to take him back, then she does something, like chill with one of her male friends and dude gets mad, she will say “On Tuesday February 15th 2011 at 9:05 AM you cheated on me with Mercedes so you can put your little attitude back there and cut the shit.” Even if you let her spend your black card on a shopping spree she will ALWAYS remember whatever you did to hurt her. Material things can’t replace broken hearts or hurt emotions. If you lie about something, she will most likely catch you and investigate especially if she knows the truth.

Female: What where you doing last night?
Male: Me and Rob started going to the gym, and then after we went for a drink at the bar.
*Female takes mental note Friday February 11th from 5:42pm-11:35pm he went to the gym and bar with Rob*

*Next Day*
Female: You went to the gym and bar again last night?
Male: Yeah it was a tough work out, me and Rob did an extreme workout it went well.
Female: MHMMMM
*Mental Diary Saturday February 12th from 5:30pm-11:55pm he went to the gym and bar with Rob. I talked to Rob’s wife earlier today and he planned a whole dinner date for their 1 year wedding anniversary”

DON’T BE STUPID SHE WILL FIND OUT!!! Especially if the time frames and shit you’re doing is off and very weird trust and believe she will find out.

Anything of importance she writes it in her diary and MAKES sure it’s used for reference purposes, as in anniversaries, birthdays, missed outings, painful experience, embarrassing moments, hurt feelings etc. Women remember everything especially if it’s something meaningful or hurtful. I bought one of my coolest female friends some flowers and some wine just because she was feeling down, (her boyfriend broke up with her). To this day she still remembers the time, how the weather was, what I was wearing and what kind of flowers they were. This was almost 2 years ago and I don’t remember this stuff. All I remember is that she had some extra gummy worms lying around and I ate them. Harsh, but it’s the truth, those joints where amazing. Back to the matter at hand: WOMEN REMEMBER EVERY LITTLE THING SO DON’T FUCK SHIT UP. They will bring stuff up, whether good or bad, and tell you what it is.

“Girls keep sticky notes” refers to how a girl will remember something for a short time period and it eventually gets blown away from memory either because 1. They don’t care anymore or 2. They are given something. Some of you “GIRLS” know damn well you do this shit or did it at one point in your life then grew up. I’ve seen a girl get so angry with her man that she is ready to break up with him because he keeps doing the same mess but she lets him back in because he keeps getting her things like flowers, new shoes, new hair, a dog etc. These are material chicks who don’t keep diaries because they are quick to forget because they know they are going to be given something so they forgive and forget. Sticky notes are something you use for a quick reference and post it somewhere, after awhile it loses its stickiness or gets blown away and gets forgotten. You remember what you want to remember and just keep life going. Since females mature faster than guys this is usually something that is dropped between the ages of 16-20 if it’s still with you then . . . I don’t know, grow up maybe?

Word to the wise, don’t beat around the bush, be truthful to yourself and just give the diary respect. As guys we know women remember everything so we have to respect the “Diary of a Woman.” Growth defines the difference between a Woman and a Girl.

Standards in Relationships

As we continue our topic on having standards . . .today’s topic refers to standards in relationships. So i got some friends to express there thoughts on standards in relationships.

Kevin Pierre
I believe that when it comes to standards you “MUST” think about them before you venture off into the world. Especially when it comes to relationships, people complain about being hurt and this and that but that just means you have to up your standards a bit more just to get that right thing that fits you. It’s like when you’re making Cherry koolaid, it taste okay at first and then after it gets a little bitter and it stops having that buzz that you like. So you update your taste buds to some Grape koolaid, then this has you good for awhile and then loses its appeal to you, so you update to something else. Standards is having something that fits you, that appeals to you and meets your requirements not just “SETTLING” for anything. I was told by my friend “Never just settle for anything” if you just settle that means you don’t care what you let in your life and if that happens you just get hurt.You can’t just “PICK” someone just because there 5’5, brown eyes, thick thighs and a beautiful smile. It has to go deeper then the norm of outer appearance and certain things the person can do for you.

Of course once in a blue I’ll have my friends give there opinions on my topics there opinions i trust and pretty much feel the same way so why repeat the samething twice? lol so . . . .

Munchy Today, people are getting into relationships without setting any standards or boundaries. Although, one may ask,”What are some standards in a relationship?” Personally I think that those standards reflect on the ones you look for in a man/woman.

1.)Respect
(My theory)I’m a very observant kind of gal and I believe that If date a man who is completely disrespectful to his mother, nine times out of ten he will not have any respect for you.

2.) Double-Standard
Don’t implement any rules that you know you WILL NOT follow. *pet peave* Fellas/ladies– If you know you are a flirt don’t tell your partner not to if you are not willing to change and abide by YOUR own rule.

3.) Education
I value education, so it’s extremely important to me! A man that can speak for himself and teach YOU something is a beautiful thing ladies (without insulting your intelligence, of course). In life you are constantly learning, so why not learn more about the opposite sex?

4.)Loyalty
We all need someone who will be faithful to commitments and obligations. I want to know that the person I’m dating always has my back whether it is a with small helpful deed or to be there for me emotionally (e.g. advise, tot lend a ear, shoulder to cry on,etc). They are not just focused on YOU, but also on the GROWTH of the relationship itself.

Andre F.There are a few things that I hold dear when it comes to someone that I date. It has changed as I have gotten older and value women much more so now.

I value intellect. There is nothing more appealing to me than a woman who can go punch for punch with me on any and every issue that we talk about. When a woman possess this quality, i feel we always have something to talk about and if we always have something to talk about we in turn are willing to tell each other everything. Communication is key!

I value self-respect. Any girl that has self-respect for herself can surely be a potential wifey for me. Its a lot of whores running around today and I don’t like that.

I value women who understand traditional roles but wont succumb to them just because a man tells them to do so. Girls who can cook, clean, do it all. Your 5-star chick basically. These women are become more and more rare.

I value looks. I am not shallow but I like for my shorty to compliment me in the looks department.

I also value a women who is god-fearing! For she and I to have a good relationship, we both have to have a strong relationship with GOD.

Those are the main ingredients. These are are things I value when I get serious with a chick.

Why Do People Cheat In Relationships? (Topic Chosen By Crystaline R.)

Today’s topic is something that is becoming common among a lot of people today in relationships. I am talking about those who are in relationships and cheat on the other person they are with. What is so wrong in your relationship that you have to cheat on the other person? Why can’t you just break up with the person you are with first then get with whoever you want? Why stay in the relationship and hurt the other person just because you still have feelings for them?
There are a million questions you can ask these people but most likely there answer will be “I don’t know.” Some might not have a clear definite answer to this question, so once again “WHY DO PEOPLE CHEAT IN RELATIONSHIPS?!”

Top 4 reasons people cheat in relationships:
1. Boredom: They ‘re tired of being with the same person after so long they want something new
2. The Rush: They like the RUSH of keeping secrets and the risk of almost getting caught it gets there adrenaline pumping
3. Revenge: They cheated on you so you cheat on them
4. You allow them to: The person forgives you . . .this just shows that your allowing them to get away with it so they’re going to keep doing it

For those who cheat instead of messing with the persons head why don’t you just break up? Seriously . . . that’s my question for you “WHY DON’T YOU JUST BREAK UP WITH THEM?” Instead of keeping the relationship going just break up, end it and go with the next person that you wanted? Just remember that you get what you ask for. As Tyler Perry applied in his movie “Why Did I Get Married?” this is when the 80/20 rule comes into effect

“The 80/20 Rule is simple. In a healthy relationship, you get about 80 per cent of what you need/want from your partner. They are caring, respectful and share a lot of the same interests as you, but then you meet someone who catches your attention for an unknown reason. It may well be because they fulfill the missing 20 per cent in your relationship – namely the sexual component. Because that 20 per cent has been missing for so long, you quickly conclude, “Hey, this person has everything I am looking for in a partner.” This can be a relationship killer. Since you jump genitals-first for this new interest, you may have given up your 80 per cent loving partner for a 20 per cent fling. The regret automatically sets in.”

In long relationships people assume that they’re not getting enough from the relationship and always jump on the next ship that comes into port but why do that when you may have the BEST thing that ever happened to you? People cheat for the dumbest reason’s all we can do is live and learn from the experience. No matter what it seems like, everyone will get cheated on at one point in life and what you do from there is up to you.

References:
http://travismagazine.wordpress.com/2009/02/10/why-we-cheat-the-8020-rule/
Tyler Perry “Why Did I get Married?”