Drunk Texting

Sometimes I find myself in random situations that I magically put myself in knowing that they happen to all of us. I’ve always been a stubborn person with my emotions (as most men are). As men we clearly don’t open up but with everything that happened last year in my life that stubborn wall I had up came crumbling down. I would find myself trying to fix the wall but then I’d be out drinking with some friends and it would come down a little more. Then I’d be stuck in my feelings texting the wrong people.

We all drunk text and let our drink get the best of us. Sometimes when people know you are drinking they want to get the truth out of you, so they hit you up first. We are all extra friendly and a lot more truthful when we are intoxicated. The truth comes out and you just want to tell people whats really on your mind. Either how they fucked up, how you hate them, how much you love them or just something that doesn’t apply to them. You just want to get whatever off your chest that’s just been bothering you but you acted like you didn’t care about. Once you finally get that liquid courage you just let go. I’ve found myself a couple times in the past year doing that. I know better but I was completely in a different space and I definitely didn’t care while I was intoxicated.

The next day I’d wake up looking at my phone like, “Did I really send this?” or “Did I really talk to this person like this?” I mean drinking relaxes you and makes you more susceptible to your feelings. We all know this. It’s all about what you do after you get to this point. Drunk texting is apart of life so don’t get to caught up. Lessons are learned quickly from messing getting drunk and saying what’s really on your mind.

Love Yourself (Part 2)

 

It is so important to love yourself before jumping into a relationship. Sometimes your past relationship teaches you about things you should and shouldn’t do in your future relationships. I’ve always been a creature of habit and investing 100% into someone. The reason for this is that I don’t want someone to doubt how I feel about them. Not saying it’s a bad thing but a lot of people can’t deal with it. They go from one toxic relationship to a very healthy one and it’s like a dream for them.  I’m a 90’s R&B love kind of guy and always treat the person as they should be treated.                                                                                                                   
    The question you should ask someone is ,”are you really ready for a relationship?” The only reason why is because people love the idea of a relationship but don’t really want one. They haven’t healed from the damage or the hurt from the past before trying to jump into something new. Some people don’t like to be alone and this is why they get into it with people. 
    I was in a situationship with someone who I thought really wanted to be with me. She was completely mental after I really thought about all the things I did for her. Went 6 months with us doing couple like things and the moment I asked her to be my girlfriend she said ,” you asked me the wrong way.” Being that I don’t like asking things twice I didn’t ask again because it was just weird. She then kept asking me to ask her again, I replied ,”I don’t feel like you want to be in a relationship with me.” She said she did but her actions led me to believe different. A couple months later that came to be true. She just wanted someone to be around when she wasn’t at work. Yes, it was wasted time but I learned so much about what to do and what not to do when talking with someone. It reminded me to trust the process and know that everyone is not for you. To string someone along because you aren’t sure is never right.  If you can’t properly love yourself you shouldn’t even try to entertain someone.

Let’s Build

You ever get into something with someone and hope that you could actually build something with them and it actually turns into nothing special? Like you are the one building them up and it’s not reciprocated at all. When you are supposed to be a “team” and build together but it’s not working out the way you wanted. You realize you are dealing with a person with no vision/goals for the future and they just want to stay stagnant. In the beginning they had all these ambitions but as they proceeded to get comfortable with you they just want you to just be happy with who they are. That’s great and all but the world doesn’t stand still for stagnant people.
We’ve all been at that stage in our lives when we just want to build with someone and leave the tomfoolery behind us. Sometimes it is just hard finding someone of quality that is on the same level as us though. We think we are getting closer but they do something to mess it up and so we move on. Whenever you decide you finally want to get into something you both should have the intention of building something great. If you’ve talked about it in the beginning then you should know where you both stand. Greatness is built over time but if you both have an understanding then you will start laying the ground work. The worst thing is to deal with someone you have to build up, while trying to build yourself up. The world doesn’t work that way. Before getting into a relationship or doing anything with someone make sure you are good and you are ready to build.
I always find myself in awkward situations with women who realize that I have a plan for my personal growth every year. I never want to remain the same person I was the year before and I continually grow. We can grow together but you have to know what you want from life and move forward. Not everything in life can be planned but your personal growth and the direction you want your life to go in should be. You always want to continue building by yourself but life is really enjoyable when you can actually build with someone just as dope as you. Let’s build and become something better.

#HeyBestFriend

So your best friend is supposed to be someone you can rely on no matter what, they are your extended family. That person is literally another you but in a different form. You have your ups and downs but you come back and know this person has your back no matter what. When you aren’t thinking straight this person puts you right back on track. Sometimes they are the voice of reason for you or you both are petty together. This person, no matter what is going on, is your ride or die till the end.
Not everyone can be a best friend honestly and we all have different types. I have different flavors of best friends that play their roles perfectly. Being that I am a guy most times we don’t refer to other guys as our best friends but more like “our boys” or “we just know what it is” type of thing. That’s my boy and that’s kind of it or we will say best friend. As men we are weird sometimes but let’s proceed. The flavor of friends I have range from analytical, calm, cautious, fuck it, regular petty, really petty and turn up. My friends always are supportive with the decisions I make and will go with them. It’s always good not to have too many of the same flavor type of friends because this may go wrong sometimes. You need to find a balance. I have that one friend who is really petty with a mix of turn up and fuck it but then I have another one who is a mix of regular petty, analytical and calm. Most of my friends are really petty and not regular petty. So anything that’s overboard I go to my regular petty best friend for like a 2ndverification on what my really petty friends would say. That’s only if I am not feeling really petty at the time but yeah I am always really petty. You need a balance on all things so you know not to be too crazy.
The moment you know someone isn’t your best friend is when they stab you in the back. They are toxic to your health and always provide you with bad advice. They do things that fuck up your shit. We have all had those “oh we use to be friends” type of people in our lives. We’ve removed them because their value dropped and they brought nothing good to the table. The moment that someone brings bad vibes, discourages you or trips you into the wall they can’t be your friend anymore. A best friend title is a privilege and not something you just give to anyone. If these people don’t bring value, encourage your growth and uplift your life then they really shouldn’t be your best friend.