Waiting is something we commonly do for things that we want but is all waiting good? It depends on how you view it and what situations present themselves. Why are you waiting? Do you really have to wait? Will it benefit you if you wait? Apply this thought process to when you are dating someone. We all have waited for something to happen or waited for someone. You just have to remind yourself, “Is this person worth waiting for” or “Is my time being wasted.”

I always find myself in weird situations or I know of someone in an odd situation. I have waited for people in relationships to get better, change their habits or for them to be ready to actually date me. All in all people say waiting for any of these situations is just stupid. I personally think you learn more about what type of person you are by waiting. Waiting for someone to be ready to date you, even though they have all the BS in the world going on and you wait. You wait for them to put you on the roster and show them what they are missing. Yes you could have dated someone else but something about this person keeps you interested and intrigued. So you continue to wait. The moment you are in a relationship and notice that someone has a really bad habit you don’t like but you say, “oh they will grow out of it” and they don’t. So now you are stuck. The habit doesn’t bother you as much but it’s either an extremely annoying or bad habit. The one girl I dated smoked weed like every day but didn’t have money for anything else. Spent all of her money on weed. Initially when we started talking she didn’t smoke that much but once she got comfortable it turned into an everyday type of thing. I waited for her to change her habit but of course that didn’t do anything. Another person I dated was literally the parent to her parents which was very saddening (both parents had some type of cancer). I didn’t date her for that long because she didn’t want me to wait for her to get her situation together. She stopped me before I could fully invest in us growing together and I appreciated that. 

People say waiting for someone is one of the joys of life. Sometimes people may be at their lowest or have a plan in the works that you know nothing about. Is all waiting good though? I have a couple of friends who are in relationships and they’ve been in them for at least 6+ years. Some people are saying they should have been married already. What’s the rush? The best things come to those who wait. Yes they’ve established the conversations about marriage but the moment you rush somebody into something is the moment they take a step back. Feeling forced to do something is something you never want. 

Certain situations in life put you in a bad place and you don’t intentionally try to make people wait but it happens. I think the worst thing I’ve heard was, “I can’t wait for you to get better.” That is someone who has reached the limit and just wants to move on with life without you. It doesn’t matter the situation but for someone to say, “I can’t wait” and you try to understand why, it’s already too late. Things won’t be the same and it’s time to let go. All in all waiting is what you make it. Is the person worth the wait? Is the person just wasting your time? You are the only one that can answer this question.

Talking to my friend about dating in your 20s and realizing that it’s so miserable is extremely funny. Your early 20s you don’t really care, your mid 20s you think you still have time and then your late 20s you try to rush things without thinking them through. All in all we are just waiting for a simple text back from someone to show us some type of interest. We send that initial message and hope for something back in a timely fashion. Then we see them tweet, post pics on Instagram/facebook and snapchat something corny without them responding back to our text message. 

When dating in your 20s the initial communication thing is something we hope would be consistent and eventually realize it doesn’t remain that way. Sometimes you have to ask someone, “can I get a text back?” Are you really worth a response back though? Yes you might be worth a response back but not at this moment. Yes we are glued to our phones but sometimes we become preoccupied with other things. That’s not an excuse but we are so confused with our 20s that everything is so undefined. Then when you hit your late 20s you are still trying to figure out life but rush things. You feel like you wasted so much time not defining things and then you hit your early 30s and are against the clock. You will never be at a point in your life where everything is defined. Sometimes getting to a better spot is actually responding back to that random text and defining if you even want to text back. If you are like me my response is normally, “ delete my number but follow me on Instagram though.” You can’t entertain every response you get but you should define where you want it to go. Building something with someone takes time but time is always moving. Risks are taken so you can learn what you should accept and what you shouldn’t.

Honestly I am one of those people who receives text messages, look at them and mentally respond. Then I think about it later like ,”why didn’t this person text me back yet” and realize I didn’t respond back. I believe that you shouldn’t hit someone back if they haven’t hit you back. It’s like a back and forth thing but when it just goes in one direction you need to stop yourself and go on about life. Yes pride gets in the way but if you become that person to always initiate the conversation people will always expect that from you. We are a generation that fails at communication but we have to get better at defining what we want with these people in our lives. Time is forever moving forward and it won’t stop for anyone.